Listen up, it's past midnight, and so I'm liable to talk a little crazy. I've been ruminating over details of my life, and I realized for the first time ever that there is actually something I regret doing.
Everything you do creates a path that leads you to this moment in time, that makes you who you are today. If you like who you are today, that's a good thing. And I do like who I am today. But there is a very large event in my not-too-distant past that I have taken issue with as of late.
If you're just starting high school, and have any sort of romantic leanings, let me explain something to you. Sometime over the next four-ish years, you are going to meet an absolutely amazing girl(or guy). It will be love at first sight, and when you actually do summon the balls to ask them out, you will fall head-over-heels for them. 'I love you' will be said far, far, far too early into the relationship. You will get wrapped up in each other. You will be convinced that they are 'the one'.
You're throwing your life away, your prime years. Run as far away from that person as you can, they are trouble for you. 'The one' does not exist. 'The one' is a delusional fantasy created so that you would bind yourself to a person and become dangerously co-dependent upon them. If you get in a relationship with That Girl, you are going to waste over a year of high school. For me, it was most of my junior year and the very start of my senior year.
That Girl was bad for me. I couldn't see it because I was so 'in love' with her, but because of her, I allowed my talents and my gifts to stagnate for almost one full year.
The worst part? From the beginning of the relationship, I heard God tell me to leave her, to break up with her. I heard God say that he had something better. I now know that my foolishness ruined a year of my life. Yeah, I had one heck of a dopamine and oxytocin high, but I allowed this girl to wrap me around her finger, I allowed her to take my focus from God and the use of my talents.
I sit here and realize I threw a year of the time I was supposed to use to prepare for life straight into the trashcan.
Don't do that. Long-term relationships have no place in high school. Period. High school years are supposed to be a term of preparation for the real world, not a time to prance around and play house with some chick or some dude who makes you feel fuzzy inside. Grow up.
Furthermore: high school ruins things. Suppose you do meet someone you are insanely compatible with, shares your faith, and wants the same number of kids you do(ladies, I want none, keep that in mind when trying to get my attention); do you really want to have to endure high school together? If there's one thing that being a minor, having a job that barely pays a thousand a month, and having a buttload of schoolwork to do relationships, it's ruin them. This is only magnified by the fact that most people don't even know who they are yet.
Young relationships are not a bad thing. Far from it. The Bible is constantly saying 'the wife of your youth'. And youth back then was really young. But if you just look at that phrase, you're missing another point, another key verse. Genesis 2:24- "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." Hey, guess what? You can't leave your father and mother in high school, you nimrod.
"But, Matt," you say. "I'm so in love I feel sparkles in my happy place when she/he's around."
If you're a guy, come a little closer so I can smack you across the face. Love is not a feeling. Get that through your head! Attraction is a feeling. Infatuation is a feeling. Love is the highest commitment to a person that you will place their needs and desires above yours, even unto the ending of your own life. Again, read Genesis 2:24. That's God's description of how dating is supposed to go. Are you a Christian? Are you in high school? Are you in a high school relationship? You're sinning. Get out of that relationship and stop screwing around with your life.
It's called tough love, deal with it. Stop crying and get over yourself, you'll be a better person for it.
This random late-night post has been brought to you by Monster, the unofficial drink of writers everywhere.
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